Hey, Tom! I have such a different approach to trust. Trust is ultimately a choice! Mine to make and give. I will not hold people hostage to my own choices. I prefer to trust first, find out later. I trust people to be human: both flawed and perfect at the same time! I strive to create an environment in which people feel respected, valued, cared for, consulted with, considered. So, to begin with, I choose to trust completely that they will be honest, trustworthy, good, responsible. And I behave accordingly. I feel only then can I create a trusting space for them to be at their very best. People can of course have any reaction they choose: value, use or abuse my trust. Many have showed me that trust and perseverance in it can bring out the best in people. I am grateful for these relationships, many of which are or have been a part of my life.

I am sometimes let down. And when I am, I feel strong enough to deal with it as a consequence of my choice. I take any action necessary and need not blame the other for betraying my trust. I re-evaluate my choice to trust and know that I can continue to do so openly, freely. I can moderate my trust, focus it or reset it entirely. It is STILL my choice.

I know I feel happier doing this and I have created great possibilities for a great many things in my life. I have found wonderful response and I believe that a fair share of pain (no more, no less). Yet I refuse to allow the let-downs to change my resolve. I want to be trusting. So I am. I also want to be realistic and aware of my environment. So I strive to be that, too.

I guess both approaches can work. But for me, I much prefer to trust in the good and allow it to come forth.

Thanks for a thoughtful post, Tom and for your constant dose of encouragement.