Great Post,
Like you, I too have served many leaders who thought leadership was about being a dictator. Is it any wonder then that we hear leaders...heck even our president saying they need an ass to kick as I discuss in my blog: http://nosmokeandmirrors.wordpress.com/2010/06/18/what-should-you-do-if-you-report-to-an-%e2%80%9cass-kicker%e2%80%9d%e2%80%a6forgive-them/
However you don't need to let the “kicking” flow down hill.

 The quickest way to adjust is forgive the dictator so their behavior does not taint your leadership.

Mark Allen Roberts