Hi, Mary:)

"Life becomes easier when you learn to accept an apology you never got."
Source:  Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com

The thing that comes to my mind while reading your fascinating and courageous tale is about the difference between transaction and transformation.  In a transaction, we expect fairness and look for exchanges to take place (You give me something, I give you something), while transformation is only about us.

Personally I think you exhibited courage in talking to The Punisher.   What another person does in an interchange is not under your control, but you did take responsibility for addressing the issue squarely with him.

Short Version:  Some folks are jerks and ain't nobody gonna change them:)

John