Jane, thanks for the great post. I can't tell you how much I agree with #3 above. If you won't let people fail occasionally, and probably more often than you're even comfortable with, then you're going to create a place where everyone is tense.  I try to tease a bit about some failures so they aren't repeated.  If they're repeated, then I stop teasing and become more direct.  I'm not sure that's the best way to do it, but it seems to help maintain some balance.  Thanks again. Mike...